A Binge is Still A Binge

Oh Bla Di, Oh Bla Da. My cat has a broken arm. In fact, she carries around a stumpy cast all day and lately has been learning to walk and even run with it quite well. Unfortunately, she has also learned how to use it like a baseball bat, and swings it against the bedroom door every night. The loud bang, bang, bang to an untrained ear might be confused as an armed robber. But we know that its just an annoying ass Jilley Cat trying to get it so we will pet her.

Where is this story going you may ask? Well just hold on one minute and let me get there. I think all that banging and running with the cast somehow knocked something loose! Jill saw an opportunity and ran with it so to speak. She spend all day yesterday chewing at the cast until it was loose enough that she could break free! Do you know what popped out of that cast? A tiny little, scrawny, chicken bone arm with matted and missing fur that looked like it was about to break at any second! Oh no! To make matters worse, my pristinely clean kitty took this as an opportunity to lick, lick, lick as feverishly as she could at the matted fur to make it bea-ti-ful again.

We hurriedly put her in her cat carrier to try and restrict her movement when we realized that this was the carrier that she can break out of. She literally pushes her nose against the netting so hard that she pops through! This would not do. We then attempted to drill air holes in a little box we thought we could keep her in overnight. As we placed her in the box, we realized how inhumane this proposition was. I felt like she was a rat that we were waiting to feed to the snake until morning. Now what the hell are we going to do? As a last resort, Sansjob had to run to Wal-Mart at 10 o'clock at night (that's a whole other story) and buy a new cat carrier to hold her in until the vet opened in the morning.

This is where the binge comes into play. Now you might be thinking of a normal binge like eating 3 large Costco muffins in one day, or eating lots of cookies and chips and brownies. No! This was no ordinary binge, in fact I hardly consumed much food at all. I had four pieces of chocolate. But again, this was no ORDINARY chocolate. It was low carb (devil)chocolate. One piece is usually all the stomach can handle, and boy was I paying for it this morning. Actually, my intestines and husband were paying for it. If anyone has ever had low-carb candy they know how gassy it makes you, and I am no exception! In fact, I am still paying for it now and praying no one walks into my office for at least 30 seconds....